Zap. The biometric-data-swap-card had recorded my exit time. I hung the card round my neck and started walking down the steps to my car. Beep. My car opens with the automatic security system. I get in, turn on the radio and close my eyes for a second. Strange, technology has fixed so many things in our life; has made life so comfortable! But one bad day, and all the comfort seems painful. I know this rough day will end soon, I’ll be smiling, hanging out with my friends, yet it is so difficult to finish this moment.
I start the engine. And the tension begins to ease. It started as a necessity, then a luxury and now, after so many years, I never realised how much I enjoyed driving. I release the clutch and the car starts to move. Within seconds I am on the fifth gear. Wow. Was driving a passion?
I see the traffic turning a corner and follow the cars, with no real destination in mind. Following the crowd is easier. You don’t really need to think twice.
But where the crowd dwindles, I decide to plunge ahead. I am almost on the outskirts, driving for about an hour; have I left the city? I don’t know; haven’t kept track of the mile-stones. I am driving when I cross a tea stall. Wait. I reverse and head back.
It’s 8 years since I got out of college, could it be possible that I haven’t had this-something-that I thrived on for 8 years? That thought frightens. Could it be reality? What else have I left behind? I turn off the radio. I remove the ID-card and keep it aside. I relish the moment and the memories. I think about the child that I was and the man that I have become. I hear the oceans. I hear the winds whispering. How good do I feel about myself?
I close my eyes and think of all those things that bring a smile to me: my friends, my love, my family. But my heart plunges with a sudden adrenaline rush as I realise what I REALLY want to do, at that moment. I reverse, speed up maximum, and head straight to the one place I loved and that one place where I was my own person.
I walk to the auditorium. I climb the steps to it; to the back stage where we practised. I open the door and find it, placed exactly where it were supposed to be.
I pick it up and walk to the main area. I stand on that stage, to an audience of empty chairs; and I play the music.
I play till I can smile no more,
I play so I can smile;
I play to compensate yesterday,
I play to heart’s core.
I stand there; not so someone watches me,
I stand there so I watch myself,
I stand there to feel that energy,
I stand there; it is still with me.
I stand there because I enjoy,
That something within me;
I don’t know whether they see it,
It doesn’t concern me.
I stand there playing the cords
Of my soul,
I move with the music made,
I fill the air with that moment,
I fill it, so it will live.
And I know that is how each life feels,
I know that it is life,
I know this feeling exists,
I know it never dies.
I know I may be far away,
Yet that love thrives,
I know time will travel,
But it will never die.